


Stan's Guide to Manliness

by Amydiddle



Series: Stan's Guides [3]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - Relativity Falls, Angst, Crying, Emotional pain, Feels, Gen, Mabel's Guide, Ouch, Stan's Guide, Young Stan Twins, everyone needs to cry sometimes, stanley needs a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-10
Updated: 2016-09-10
Packaged: 2018-08-14 04:50:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7999198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amydiddle/pseuds/Amydiddle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>PROPERTY OF STAN F. PINES</p><p>STOP: THIS VIDEO IS PRIVATE PROPERTY ONLY TO BE VIEWED BY ONE STANLEY FILBRICK PINES. IF YOU ARE NOT HIM AND HE HAS NOT GIVEN YOU DIRECT PERMISSION TO VIEW THIS THEN PUT THIS DOWN AND WALK AWAY. IF IT'S, LIKE, FORTY YEARS IN THE FUTURE AND THE FUTURE PEOPLE WANT TO WATCH THIS THEN...maybe? I dunno, I am probably dead or really old or something....</p><p>JUST DON'T WATCH OKAY? OKAY!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stan's Guide to Manliness

**Author's Note:**

> Based of the Relativity Falls Au where Stan Twins switch with Mabel and Dipper. I tried to write it in the format in which the official Mabel's Guides appear in. This one is more feelsy and may hit close to home with people. I didn't realize it when I was writing it but it kind of hits close to me too. 
> 
> Enjoy. *hands tissues box just in case it makes people cry*

Stanley Pines sat on his bed with a magician’s hat covering his brown hair, the boy’s grey sweater mimicking a tuxedo and he looked like he had stolen some of his brother’s nicer pants to complete the professional look. Stanford Pines sat opposite of him, still in his purple beaker patterned pajama pants and in a grey shirt that looked like it needed a wash. He had a bored expression on his face as his brother shuffled around a deck of cards.

“Is this your card?” Stanley asked, pulling out a card from his grey sweater’s sleeve with a confident smile. On the playing card it showed the queen of hearts.

Ford glanced at it, “No.”

“Ah ha- wait no?” Stan’s confidence drained as he turned the card around and squinted at it. “But I was so sure… let me try again.”

Ford sighed, “Stan you have been at this for the last three minutes. There are fifty-two possible cards I could have picked and so far you have gotten none of them because you keep starting the trick over.”

Stan stared at his twin before his face morphed into one of annoyance. He threw the deck up into the air as he stood up from the bed.

“Whatever, I didn’t want to be a magician anyway.”

“Stanley,” Ford protested, the cards raining down around him. His twin didn’t listen as he marched out of the room.

Stanford sighed and looked at the mess around him, spotting a card that had landed on the bed next to him. He picked it up and let out a small laugh, showing it so the camera could capture the image. The card was the ace of clubs, “Looks like you found my card after all, Lee.”

Putting the card in his pocket he hopped off the bed, looking around a little unsure of what to do.

“Um, I guess…this has been Stan’s Guide to Magic or something? I was asleep through most of this so...” He said nervously before moving out of frame to turn the camera off. That is when the intro for this episode began to play.

* * *

* * *

The opening sequence began with sticker made words on a goat’s side reading ‘Stan’s Guide to’ and began to show random clips from past episodes with a remix of the name Stanley began played with peppy music. Some of those things looked illegal and some just looked silly. One clip showed the child falling over after a rainbow of very intense color came streaming through a window.

The intro ended with a crayon drawn sign taped to the wall. The red crayon words reading _‘Stan’s Guide to Manliness’_ and were surrounded by drawings of dumbbells and weights and a few stickers that had encouraging saying printed on the surface. It stayed focused on the sign till the music fully cut out before flipping over to Stanley.

Stanley was sitting in the spare room in the shack on the old red couch by the stain glass window. He wasn’t wearing his usual sweater, opting to have on his red and white striped shirt. A smile was on his face, though it seemed a little forced. The image of the room was slightly tilted as if the camera wasn’t being held properly or wasn’t on a proper stand.

“Hey there, before anything is said in the reviews about the camera being a little weird I am recording without my normal crew,” Stan explained, glancing away from the camera. He scratched at his arm before turning his attention back toward the recording device.

“You see, they had some issues with admitting that I am the manliest guy in Gravity Falls.”

* * *

The image suddenly changed without any warning that the scene was going to change. The image was now showed the normal attic bedroom that was usually the setting for most of these videos, the camera getting set on a proper stand and being held steady pointing at Stanley’s bed.

“Is it on, Fidds?” Stan said from somewhere off screen.

“Yeah, you can start whenever.” Fiddleford said from behind the camera.

A few seconds later a pink blur jumped onto the bed, Stanley Pines bouncing on the mattress with a grin on his face. His glasses were perched on his nose and he wore a pink, slightly sparkly, sweater with the words ‘Alpha Twin’ stitched on in different colored fabric.

Stan sat staring at the camera for a few seconds as if trying to figure out exactly where he wanted to start. He grinned, braces shining in the sunlight coming through the attic's window and began the introduction. 

“We all know that I am the definition of true toughness and manliness in my little group of friends,” Stan began, a smirk on his freckled face. A muffled giggle sounded from behind the camera making Stanley stop with his 'well thought out' speech, the boy looking just over the camera with a confused frown on his face.

“What?” He asked. 

“Nothin’, nothin’,” Fiddleford said, “Just it is hard to take you seriously when you say that while wearing a sparkly pink sweater.”

Stan just looked more confused as he grabbed the edge of his sweater to look down at it. His great aunt had given it to him from her childhood stash, he had really liked it when he had found it. He thought it fully embodied everything he was. Fun but also clearly the better out of Ford and him. 

“What is wrong with it?” He asked, glancing up over the edge of his glasses.

“Nothin’,” Fiddleford insisted, sounding guilty that he had said something.

“No, it is something. Tell me,” Stan said, glaring at his friend.

The sound of someone shuffling nervously behind the camera could be heard and Stan did not let up his glare.

“It just looks a little more in the cute department than the tough one,” Fiddleford finally said, his voice softer than normal.

“Cute?”

“You have sweater paws for Pete’s sake, Stanley.”

Lee stared at his pink yarn covered hands, his face slowly changing color to match the clothing article. The boy’s expression turned angry as he moved to pull off the sweater and throw it across the room.

“Stanley, you didn’ have to do that!” Fiddleford protested, but the boy had already stood up.

“I’m done recording for today, Fidds.” The boy said, his voice void of emotion.

“Stan-“

* * *

The video changed before Fiddleford could finished the sentence. The scene now showed Stanley sitting on a stump outside. He wasn’t wearing a sweater at all, instead opting for a blue t-shirt that had a few encouraging stickers on it. On his cheek were a couple of Band-Aids that seemed to have pictures on them but from where the camera was placed it was hard to figure out what they were of.

“Okay, take two of this Guide.” Stanley said, smiling brightly at whoever was being the camera.

“I am going to skip the intro for now and go straight into the ways to look tough because when you look tough you start acting tough and when you act tough you obviously ARE tough.”

Stan said, smirking at the camera. Quiet laughter was being picked up on the camera’s sensitive microphone but Stan didn’t seem to hear it, the boy turning around and grabbing a box from behind the stump.

“Step one, Band-Aids!” He showed the box to the camera. On the box it showed they were batman Band-Aids. “The more Band-Aids you have on the tougher you look!”

The child demonstrated by taking one out and then sticking it on his elbow. The Band-Aid he put on wasn’t a batman one; this one was pink and seemed to have small cats all over it. Stan looked at it before shrugging, obviously not concerned that he hadn't been the gritty hero that it should have been.

“Picture Band-Aids are the coolest,” He informed the camera, “My Great Aunt buys a lot of those for us. I think they make you look extra tough because you have the power of superheroes or whatever when you put them on. They are like really cool stickers for your wounds!”

The explanation seemed to break the person holding the camera, the laughter finally reaching Stanley’s ears. The child’s cheeks dusting pink as he glanced around desperately for something funny that could be making his camera person laugh.

“What? What are you laughing at, Ford?” He asked cautiously.

“You have a Hello Kitty Band-Aid on, talking about how they are stickers for your wound, and have a puppy sticker on your glasses,” his twin said struggling to control his laughter, “Sorry, it is just a little hard to take you seriously.”

Stan’s face struggled to keep a natural expression as he took his brother’s criticism.

“So,” he asked slowly, “I’m not tough looking?”

“Well, you look like a Band-Aid and sticker covered me with your glasses on,” Ford said, his laughter slowly fading, “And the Hello Kitty Band-Aid isn’t bringing up your over-all ‘toughness’.”

Stan’s face went from neutral to dejected to angry in the span of a few seconds; his hands pulling the glasses off and dropping them to the ground. He scratched off the fresh Band-Aid next, leaving a red spot where he had just been stuck.

“Whoa! Stanley, what are you doing?” Ford said, moving over to his twin just as he was pulling off the stickers that decorated his t-shirt.

“Getting rid of all the dumb, cute stuff. I’m supposed to be tough,” Stan said, ripping the happy star sticker he had worn proudly a few moments ago. Ford reached and picked up the now dirt covered glasses.

“Stan- “

* * *

The video cut again, now back to the present Stanley Pines who was unaware that the video he was currently recording had been edited to show those last two failed attempts at recording Stan’s Guide to Manliness.

“I mean, come on,” Stan snorted, setting his hands down on the cushion of the couch and holding on a little tightly, “They are both nerds, they have the brains. I have the other thing, which is punching so obviously I am pretty manly. What else am I if I am not the tough one, right?”

His smirk fell flat and the child ended up staring at his knees for a good minute before he shook off whatever had come over him.

“Anyway, now that I won’t have any more interruptions I can teach you how to be manly and tough just like- “

The sound of the door opening stopped the boy’s statement, the child looking past the camera with an annoyed look on his face. The expression changed when he seemed to recognize the person who had come in.

A second later Mabel sat down next to Stanley on the couch. Her grey curls were up in a loose bun so her dangling gold heart earrings could be seen. She didn’t have on her fez or business suit, instead wearing a pink sweater with a red heart in the middle and a long black skirt. She didn’t seemed bother by the camera that was clearly recording something or the way her nephew was avoiding looking at her.

“Hey, jelly bean,” she said, looking at him, “You doing okay?”

Stan’s face went a little red, but not because of the the nickname. He looked down at his feet to hide his face from his aunt’s and the camera’s view.

“Yes,” he said, his voice coming out a little strained. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Because your friend and brother seem to be awfully worried about you,” she said, her voice soft. “They think they hurt your feelings because you have been avoiding them this whole week.”

Stan snorted, his arm wiping desperately at his face before he looked up at his great aunt. His eyes were a little puffy but he pushed a smile onto his face.

“They do? I didn’t know they cared,” he said, the words sounding dull to his ears even though they came out a little bitter.

“Stanley, what happened?” Mabel said, diving head first into the situation, “You haven’t worn any of the sweaters I have given you, you stopped putting stickers on everything, you haven’t been wearing your glasses…”

Stan ducked his head away just as a tear tried to escape his eye, the boy desperately wiping it away. His hopes that his aunt hadn’t noticed it were dashed when she gently turned his head to look at her. Concern was easily seen in her brown eyes as she wiped the tear tack away gently.

“Stan, What happened?”

The simple question is what made the dam burst, tears began to run down Stanley’s face. Mabel pulled her great nephew into a tight hug and petted his hair.

“Shush, it is okay. Whatever it is, I’ll make it better.”

Stanley shook his head, hating himself for crying. Just another thing that was proving them all right; proving that he wasn't as tough as he tried to be. He couldn't get words out, his throat felt like it was strangling itself, his eyes wanted to stay shut as he cried, and his ears pounded with every shaky gasp of breath or disgusting noise he let out while trying to compose himself. 

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered out through the tears once he caught his breath, “I-I shouldn’t be c-crying.”

“No, no. It is okay to cry, baby,” she said, pulling him fully into her lap. “Everyone needs to cry sometimes. Crying is just the body's way to kicking out bad emotions.”

“B-But, I-I’m thirteen,” he sniffled out, wishing his tear ducts would close up and stop the water works. “I-I am supposed t-to be a m-man. Real men d-don’t cry.”

“Who told you that?” Mabel asked, gently moving him so his face wasn't buried in her sweater and she could see him. 

“P-Pa?” He said, a little uncertain on why she was asking. 

“Well, he is a liar. Everyone needs to cry sometimes and just because you passed the magical age of thirteen doesn’t mean that you are done growing up.” She said, her tone firm but strong. Carefully she wiped the tears off his face.

“B-But,” he stuttered, “I-I can’t be tough if I cry, o-or wear my glasses, o-or sweaters, o-or...” 

More tears began to build, ruining the sense of peace he was starting to feel. He liked the sweaters his great aunt gave him, he liked the stickers and Band-Aids; he didn't want to stop them all but if he wasn't tough then he wasn't anything.

Mabel frowned, “So? Being your own person and wearing what you like makes you yourself. It makes you bold. Sounds pretty tough to me, showing everyone that you are your own man. You don't need to look tough to be someone.”

Stan wiped his face with his hands, the crying calming down, “Really?”

“Really, really,” She said with a smile, continuing rub circles on his back.

“C-can I still be tough even if I…I wear Hello Kitty Band-Aids?”

Mabel nodded, using her sweater sleeve to get the last of the tears and the snot off her nephew’s face as he began to calm down. 

“Of course. Band-Aids make you very tough no matter what they have on them. You will be my manly little jelly bean no matter what, even if you wore a floor length ball gown I am sure you could beat up anyone that said something bad to you or your brother. Wanna know why?”

“Why?” He said, a smile working its way onto his puffy face.

“Because you are a Pines,” she said confidently, “And not just any Pines! You are Stanley Pines; the toughest boy I have ever met. Now give your grauntie some sugar.”

Stanley giggled, moving his face away before she could plant a kiss on his cheek. He pulled a sugar packet from Greasy’s Diner out of his jean pocket and pressed it against her lips.

“There you go!” He giggled shyly, a small spark of himself coming back in his red rimmed eyes. 

“Oh you little trickster,” she chuckled, pushing the packet away. Using her advantage of him already sitting in her lap he began to tickle his sides. The video turning to static with the sound of Stan’s laughter filling the room.

* * *

Stanley sat on his bed alone, the camera straight and pointed at him. He had his glasses back on his face, a Hello Kitty Band-Aid on his cheek. A one-size-too-big sweater was back over his torso, this one a lavender color and depicting a sleeping cat on it; the words ‘I’ll do it tomorrow’ neatly stitched into the wool over the animal’s head.

“Hey,” he said to the camera, “I am not sure I am going to actually edit this guide, at least not for the public viewing unless they pay triple the amount because I think I learned more in the production of this Stan’s Guide then I was expecting. Considering that I was the one supposed to be teaching everyone how to be manly and tough."

He shifted his weight slightly, biting his bottom lip nervously as he struggled to figure out what to say next. He glanced everywhere around the room before looking about the camera and smile at whomever was behind the device. He lowered his eyes and talked straight into the camera after a deep breath.

“Just listen, if someone actually does find this somehow I need you to understand something. Crying doesn’t make you weak, using Hello Kitty Band-Aids doesn’t mean anything other than you like fun things, wearing goofy sweaters shows off who you really are, and being who you are shouldn’t be stopped because you want to look tough and manly by everyone’s standards.”

Stanley stood up, the camera zooming out on the boy standing on the bed. A white skirt was being worn over some blue jeans; a rainbow sock on one foot and a black sock on the other completing the mismatched outfit. 

“Being tough, or whatever, means being yourself! Even when people say it is dumb, because they are just jealous of your awesomeness and if they are people that really care about you they will eventually come around or encourage you to be yourself.”

Stanford appeared just at the edge of the frame at the end of Stanley’s bed. The boy staring at his twin before shyly smiling and climbing up next to him. Fiddleford appeared next, climbing up on the bed and standing on Stanley’s other side. Stanley threw his arm around their shoulders and pulled them in for a side hug, the big cheesy grin on his face turning to an actual smile. Both of the boys hugging back a little clumsily.

“This has been Stan’s Guide to…to something,” Stan said, “See you all next time for something amazing. I don’t know. Maybe I will get the nerds to kiss or whatever.”

“STANLEY!” Stanford and Fiddleford shouted, faces going red. Behind the camera Mabel began to laugh. The video ending just as Stanford tried to pull his laughing twin into a head lock.

**Author's Note:**

> THE CARDS: they had no meaning when I was doing the magic thing then I went to google. So I leave you with this and a question-  
> If you had to choose a card for Ford, Stan, Mabel, Dipper, or Fidds. What would you choose?
> 
> http://thecardsoflife.com/ace-of-clubs-person ((Ford's card in the beginning of the story))
> 
> http://thecardsoflife.com/two-of-diamonds-person/ ((the card that goes along with Stan Twins' birthday; June 15))


End file.
